My Dearest Argi Denise,
Christmas feels different this year. It feels incomplete without you here. We miss you terribly, especially during this season. I know you are with your grandmother, and that is fine. We want you to be happy. Your mother, Desmond Grey, and I send our love. We hope you are having a wonderful time.
I’m sending you a special gift. It’s a book that has really made me think lately, and it made me think of you too. The title might surprise you – it’s called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. I know, it sounds a bit out there! Your mom, Arlene, definitely raised her eyebrows at first. But trust me on this one, Argi.
This book is full of surprising wisdom. I’ve read it cover to cover, and it’s given me a lot to reflect on. One of the big things it talks about is the idea that sometimes the best way forward is to stop trying so hard for things that don’t truly matter. It’s about finding contentment where you are, instead of chasing some perfect, impossible version of yourself. There’s even a part about a writer who didn’t try to be famous, and that’s how he found his own kind of success. It made me think about how much pressure we sometimes put on ourselves.
Another idea that really stuck with me is about happiness. We’re always told to chase happiness, right? But this book suggests that real fulfillment often comes from facing our challenges and working through them. It’s those tough times that help us grow and figure out what’s truly important. It’s like the book says, “Happiness is a problem” – meaning it’s in solving problems that we find meaning. Think about times you’ve overcome something difficult – that feeling of accomplishment is powerful.
There’s also a really important message in the book about choosing what to care about. It emphasizes that we only have so much energy, and it’s important to focus it on the things that truly matter to us – our values, our loved ones, the things we believe in. This connects to the idea of setting boundaries and saying no to things that drain us or don’t align with what’s important. That’s a powerful lesson, especially for young women, to protect your time and energy for what truly matters to you.
The book touches on so many other things too, like the importance of taking responsibility for our choices, understanding that it’s okay to be wrong and to change your mind, and that failure is a part of learning and growing. It even talks about the fact that life is finite, which sounds a bit heavy, but it’s really a reminder to make the most of the time we have and to focus on what truly brings us joy and connection.
This book isn’t about being cold or indifferent. It’s about being thoughtful about where we direct our energy and our “fucks.” It’s about finding strength in being honest with ourselves and others, and about finding peace even when things aren’t perfect.
Argi, you’re growing up in a world that throws a lot at you. Social media, school, friendships – it can all feel overwhelming. I hope this book can be like a little guide, helping you sort through the noise and figure out what truly deserves your attention.
I love you, Argi Denise. I’m so proud of the young woman you’re becoming. Read this book with an open mind, an open heart. And please, let’s talk about it when you have a chance. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Merry Christmas, my sweet girl. We will see each other soon. I can’t wait to hear all about your holidays.
With all my love,
Mark